Member-only story
The Whole Sh*t and Caboodle
The True Tale of Jack and his Clan
People were always telling me I don’t know Jack Shit, and to be honest, they were right — I didn’t.
Was Jack Shit a person I was supposed to know? Why did his name come up again and again in even casual conversations?
Driven by a mix of curiosity and the desire to never be caught off guard again, I decided it was time to dig a little deeper and get to know Jack Shit.
I turned to genealogy and found a very interest family tree –
Meet Jack Shit, the only son of Al Shit, a fertilizer magnate. Al married Oh Shit, the enterprising owner of “Knee Deep in Shit, Inc.” Together, they had one memorable son, Jack.
Jack Shit, in a match made in heaven, married No Shit. This deeply religious couple was blessed with six children: Holy Shit, Giva Shit, Fulla Shit, Bull Shit, and the unforgettable twins, Deep Shit and Dip Shit.
Amidst family drama, Deep Shit defiantly married Dumb Shit, a high school dropout, despite her parents’ objections.
Meanwhile, after 15 years of marriage, Jack and No Shit parted ways. No Shit moved on and married Ted Sherlock, but chose to retain her maiden name. She was then known as No Shit Sherlock.
